A Hike to No Where: Some Forest near Sipsey River Wilderness

Planning to take a couple of days to hike a 13 mile circuit circuit and ‘rough it’ with the crew turned into a hike that lead us to a campsite literally about 300 feet from the car. Yeah…intrepid hikers we are. How in the heck did this happen? Well, when the blind lead the blind, typically this is the outcome.

Our crew: Benjamin “My Ax is My Best Friend” Lambert, Elizabeth “Benjamin…I really don’t think this is the way” Holcombe, Matthew “I just got back from Alaska and I have a roll-y suitcase on my back” Fitz and Stephanie “Wait…look at these snail shells and mushrooms, ya’ll” Holcombe, all started down the wrong trail, not seeing the obvious signs pointing us the right way. Plus, somehow we trusted Benjamin when he put a week’s worth of sexual favors on the table as the bet that he knew where he was going. “Whatcha want to bet this is the _____ Creek?” (I would argue Elizabeth won that bet!)

Sipsey River National Forest encompasses about 25,000 acres – all of which were at our disposal; however none of which we saw. Driving most of the day to get there only heightened the hilariousness of it all when we realized that after 5 minutes on the trail we managed to miss the entire NF. Old wagon trails and “the arc of the sun in the Northern Hemisphere” being our only guides, Benjamin lead our group through some amazing scenery….sort of. Well, for the first hour it was pretty nice, but once we started beating down thick weeds and having to resort to “Look…trees this size would not be in the wagon trail”, we should have listened to our guts and searched for an alternative trail. However, what did we know? Lost in the woods, turned around without any compass, straining to hear the ‘water’ that did not exist we traipsed and tramped our way in the ‘right’ direction.

With the sun quickly setting and no creek in site, we managed to resort to hiking to a road where we were picked up by a nice gentleman that realized we were lost. Piling us into the back of his pick up truck, he took us to his remote cabin in the woods. It was lonely out there and Elizabeth was already planning our escape route. When his wife pointed out our location on a map, we were dumbfounded at how we got there. Benjamin, our fearless leader, took it kind of rough, until we were able to make so many jokes about it that eventually he realized none of us cared. It was hilarious at that point.

After we were despondently dropped off at our car by this nice stranger and realizing it was already dusk, we compromised on a small waterfall area that had been inhabited before. Hennessy Hammocks were quickly hung, a slow fire starting (Thanks to the petroleum jelly cotton balls!) and dinner on the way. The boys made sure there was meat to cook, so as both of the dogs drooled, we polished off a dinner of smoked sausages, macaroni and cheese and about a pound of cream cheese & pepper jelly. The cold was creeping in and my eyelids were growing heavy, so Buster & I crawled into our hammock for the night. We left the boys upe beer themselves, just thankful that the waterfall was there to drown out their chatter all night. to finish off the rest of th

After hot chocolate and fake eggs the next morning, we rolled back to the car to drop off our gear. No need being further fools and carrying it on our backs when we didn’t need to. Benjamin was determined to get us on a specific trail that “was the most popular one” in the forest apparently. After wading a small stream to make it to this trail, we spent the day practicing Ninja moves and talking about Fitz’s adventures at the fishing lodge he worked at in Alaska, as well as ideas of the perfect Halloween costume. It was a lot of fun and such a memorable hike – despite it being nothing that any of us had planned for. ‘Tis life.

After a stuff-your-face lunch of wheat berry salad, sandwiches and a few beers, we got back on the road. Leaving the navigating up to the boys was a lesson learned in keeping my mouth shut. Not only did the map look upside down at one point, but we ended up in small back-woods towns with bridges out and no road signs. I figured it best to chomp on the boiled peanuts as my road snack and go to sleep … except that was impossible b/c at the most inopportune time Elizabeth’s window decided to break and remain stuck in the down position. Buster, Monty, Elizabeth and I meshed and molded ourselves around each other to keep warm, ending up resembling a pile of human play-doh.

The hike was so fun and I'd totally do it again. I learned that planning is important, but not near as important as going with the flow and enjoying the memories. Thanks guys for such a funny experience!

103.2

miles, that is. Spread across 2 days and 10 hours, Elizabeth (sister), Benjamin ("promise-ring-giver" to Elizabeth) & I biked our asses off ( & hips, shoulders, bunions, and backs -- and everything else that added up to cause pain between us), but surprisingly we never woke up sore. Go, us!...right? well.... considering the fact that I am to be studying for the GRE now, I sorely missed my goal last week. Except my math-whiz of a sister was kind enough to turn our timings, distance and expected arrivals into math quizzes for me. Yeah, she loves me enough to make me study for the GRE while fighting a headwind & wiping sweat from my brow. Thanks, EJ...I think. I did learn, however, that 50% (1/2 or 4/8) of my Cliff Bar alottment + 2 hours of riding left = stomach pains & plans of how to knock my sister off her bike to steal the "terrible" Macadamia Nut Crunch/White Chocolate thingy she had in her pack. (Moral: Carry the food yourself & never listen to Benjamin on what tastes bad!)

What started out as a 4 day ride from Jackson to Natchez and back, turned into a "we can leave on Friday after our class", to a "it's supposed to rain in the morning. Let's see what happens", to a...."let's go to the farmer's mkt. and ride the loop to Canton and then bike the Trace tom". Needless to say, 'God laughs in the face of plans'. Nonetheless, it was a fun, sweaty, challenging and memorable 2 days of biking.

The Natchez Trace proved to be a perfect biking spot. There isn't much to see -- that is if you don't appreciate rural MS -- but far less traffic than anywhere else and perfectly paved roads the whole way. (There definitely were 'rolling hills' whether you noticed or not! ) One day, I'll do the whole thing. For this go-round, the first day we road from Elizabeth's front door to old town Canton, and the second day we road from Elizabeth's front door to some sketchy "we be out uh ketchup" gas-station in Port Gibson, where Benjamin retrieved our sweaty selves 7 hrs later with 2 cold beers in tow. ... not to mention loud music, that I'll never forgive him for.

Overall, I've come to appreciate having days where the only agenda is to have fun. We probably all have far less of these days than we actually need for a truly balanced head-space. Thank you, EJ & Benjamin, for such a fun weekend, as per usual. ( I can speak directly to you now that I know you're like the 3rd and 4th confirmed readers of this blog! )

Fun memories:
grilled salad. hookah pipes & completely drug-free laughing fits. having a completely full morning of running, biking, grocery shopping and breakfast by 9:00 a.m. the official kick-start to my new ricotta/yogurt addiction. homemade flax seed bread. capresse. "I can tell by looking at your eyes that you're somebody special." pink flamingos. blown up pumpkin "not canned". V-E-C-T-O-R. chicken farms. Tadpole Road, flying spit & cash-only cheese. making mozzarella. dinner sailing cruises/ antipasto platters. The Friendship Cruise Ship. Relationship Drama over "some tall skinny bitch/Warhol woman" pizza. Outdoor Symphony inside a church. sleeping on 1/5 of a queen bed 2/2 Monty. tick, tick, and tick on the application to-do list. shortening pumpkin bread. seasonal beer. orange label madness. restoration hardware. Rainbow grocery.

Thanks, guys! It was so much fun.